So, I was having a bit of difficulty getting my belongings situated on my way back from KFC just now, right? I was walking back from my car to my dorm and I needed to get my keys in my purse while carrying my food and drink but, of course, I couldn’t figure out how to do it because my hands were full and I turn into an inept monkey whenever I have gloves on (it’s about 3 degrees outside right now and I was already feeling Winter’s keen sting). So, I stopped in an empty parking space and set my sodie pop on the ground, hoping that freeing up one hand would help. It didn’t. I came to the horrible realization that, in order to utilize my other hand, I’d have to set my warm, steaming Famous Bowl on the freezing cold cement and that my delicious vessel of happiness would most likely be a squishy hunk of mashed potato ice by the time I got to my room. OH, NO. I WASN’T SETTLING FOR THAT. I set that shit on the top of my feet like a god damn daddy penguin, got my fucking keys back in my purse, and carried on like the hardass that I am. And guess what? I HAVE WARM FUCKING MASHED POTATOES.